Scene XV: Dreaming
"Feel so free
Don't wake me from the dream
It's really everything it seemed."
--Cowboy Bebop, Blue
"We've got to hit them at the heart," Gustavson said grimly, folding his hands in front of him on the long table where papers lay scattered and the tips of laser light pointers congregated in a small heap at the center, and the wrapper of a half-eaten field ration stared hungrily up at the ceiling of the tent. "And that heart is Toris Military Base."
From across the table, Dorothy saw Milliard nod, look at Noin. Her stomach tightened and she resisted the urge to excuse herself, to run out of the meeting tent just to avoid the sight of them together. Together! It made her sick.
I'm sorry, he had said. I believe our time together is over.
She had stayed, decided to stay in spite of her better judgment. She still wasn't sure if it had been worth it.
Dorothy Catalonia was not a quitter, but there were some games which she knew she could never win, and this one was one of them.
"I'm sure Noin and Etille can tell us more about that base," Milliard said, gesturing to Etille, who sat across the table from him. "I'm not exactly sure how involved you were with that installation while you were on A007 as a colonist, but..." he trailed off.
Etille took the cue and stood. His hair had gotten longer, Dorothy realized, since his imprisonment. He must not have bothered to cut it since he had gotten back. Surprisingly, it made him look more...human.
"I was stationed at Toris Military Base, actually," he began, pointing at the place where the red X was on the light map. "When the World Nation transferred me here, they basically told me to keep an eye on the colony for them, to make sure that no kind of trouble, such as rebellions or otherwise, cropped up. They didn't want another war on their hands."
"Did you?" Milliard said.
Etille snorted. "Like hell I did. The World Nation didn't care what I did. They just wanted to get rid of me. And I knew that as well as they did, so I got here and decided to take matters into my own hands. I'd settle for second-best on some deserted colony, but it was going to be the best fucking second-rate colony in the history of second-rate colonies."
Pointing to where the capital city was on the map. "They'd attempted to settle A007 before the war, but efforts were abandoned when Heero Yuy was assassinated. They'd pulled all the miners and soldiers out, so all that was left was a city the size of a small town, abandoned, dusty, falling apart. My men and I changed all that. By the time the first group of miners arrived, we had transformed this place into a working city. The World Nation sent over some politicians, but it was the military who ran things. The politicians were just figureheads, but it didn't matter. The military knew what was best for these miners. Most of the poor fellows had never had so much as a roof over their heads for more than a few days. We gave them all that and more."
Noin frowned at the map. "So you were in command of the military."
"I was deputy commander. There was a man over me...he's dead now."
They waited in silence, but Etille offered no further information, instead walking over to one of the side tables, pulling out several sheets of a material which reflected the dim light of the glowlamps.
"What are those?"
"Pictures," he said, holding them up and letting the light seep through. Dorothy blinked. They were indeed pictures, color photos of buildings.
"What the hell?" She leaned forward, mouth open.
He smiled. "These are called slides. I had them taken a while back, took them with me when Gustavson asked me to join him. Not much in use anymore, back on Earth, but when you're in a place like this, you use whatever you can, even obsolete technology."
Milliard shot her a glance and she turned to look at him. He looked away. Etille gave both of them a sharp glance, but she ignored him, focusing on the photo.
The building was ornate, in the style of one of the smaller 18th-century chateaux in her native France, but here the resemblance ended. The wrought iron gates surrounding the building itself were reinforced iron, and there were guard towers located at regular points along the wall just inside the gates. The mansion itself had been modernized, with several wings quite obviously added on after its construction.
"Toris," Etille said, without preamble. "This was one of the old buildings left over from before the war, and the new governor wanted a private retreat where he could escape to when the going got tough. So we remodeled this for him." He nodded at Noin. "The part of the building in which Noin and I were held captive was major remodeling and add-on to the main building...a military wing, with officers' quarters and a hangar. I was the supervisor for that building project. Quite obviously, when the rebellion started, they had transformed the officers' quarters into prison cells."
Noin sucked in her breath. "That explains why they were such...nice cells." She winced. "That sounds wrong."
Etille held up the next pictures. "The back of the base. There are outlying yards and buildings and other hangar areas that I didn't bother to photograph. We'd originally intended the use of the hangars to mining transports and police vehicles only. When they got hold of the mobile suits..." he trailed off.
"They had the resources right there for storage," Gustavson said in a soft voice.
"Exactly. I wish I could have foreseen that at the time...but some things are just not possible."
"Not your fault," Gustavson said. "Is that all of the pictures?"
Etille placed the two photographs on the table. "Yes, sir." Pointing again at the map. "Toris Military Base is surrounded by several checkpoints. There are three main roads which run to the base for supply transports, which probably are used for mobile suit delivery as well. I made sure myself that those three roads are the only entrances and exits from the base."
"So what you're saying," Milliard said from the other side of the table," Is that we're going to have to figure out a way to get into the base through legal means."
Etille smiled. "Oh, we're going to have to figure out how to get into the base," he said, "but it's not going to be legal."
Milliard looked tired. He had a right to be, because he had just gotten out of bed for the first time two days ago, and even before then she had been pleading with him not to go on the next engagement. But she'd known him for too long to know that her pleas would do no good whatsoever.
"You can stop talking about it, Noin," he said the day before. "I'm going, and nothing you can say will stop me."
She wished Dorothy would stop hanging around, wished the other girl would go back to whatever duties she had. Noin had given her a fair amount of things to do, ensuring that Dorothy didn't feel left out as the deputy commander. But she knew Dorothy resented her still. Every look from the golden-haired girl, every pointed word, every gesture in her direction meant that she, Lucrezia Noin, had done something unworthy of the heir to the Dermail duchy.
Did you know?
Did you know that Dorothy Catalonia is in love with Milliard Peacecraft?
He claimed that he had changed his name for good, but he was still Zechs to her. Would always be Zechs, because the Milliard she had known during the war was a frightening one.
She didn't simply want the dashing, mysterious young warrior or the broken, bitter prince of the Cinq Kingdom. She wanted both of them.
That, to her, was who Zechs Merquise was.
She sighed, signed her name to the report that was about to be sent out to the Preventers headquarters on secure channels, made sure that Milliard could read the closing lines.
We plan several sorties on strategic air and ground bases in the vicinity of the capital. If we fail, that will be the end of our presence here, but I don't want to believe that we can fail. If Etille is right, there is too much riding on our success for us to turn back now. Keep us in your prayers.
"You're eloquent," Milliard mused as she keyed in the send button, watched as the document encryption code rolled across the screen and the words blinked at the top of the monitor.
DOCUMENT SENT. VERIFICATION CODE RECEIVED
"And that's that," she said.
"I'm still going."
Noin sighed. "I'm not going to argue with you," she said. "It's your own decision. You're commander."
Milliard laughed. "Funny. I don't feel like it."
"I don't want to be doing your job for you. I'd like you to have it back."
"I suppose I could do that," he murmured, and she shivered as his long fingers brushed the back of her neck ever so slightly. "You should get some sleep. Tonight's going to be a long night for all of us."
The afternoon sun shone in through the tent walls, the first sun she had seen in days. It was high noon, and the landscape outside was burning and barren. It was a wasteland here. She had had enough. She wanted to go home.
"Zechs?" she said, suddenly feeling very alone.
He caught the tone of her voice, turning around to look at her with gentle eyes. "What is it?"
"Do you think...you think we'll ever get to go home?"
Her voice caught on a sob. The exhaustion from the past few days flowed over her like a flood and pushed herself up from the computer chair, barely able to keep her knees from buckling.
"Noin?" he asked. She felt the touch of his hand on her arm.
"I'm so tired..."
Strong arms wrapped around her and she sobbed into his chest, feeling curiously vulnerable and ashamed and safe all at the same time.
"Don't be afraid, Noin," he whispered. "As long as...as long as I'm here..."
"Milliard?"
She froze, pushing away from him, knowing exactly who it was that had stepped into the tent. She felt Dorothy's stunned gaze on her, then on Milliard, then back on her, accusing, eyes with the force of daggers. Jealousy sharp as thorns.
"I'm sorry," Dorothy said in a frosty voice, and turned on her heel.
"Dorothy!" Milliard said. The flap closed behind her with a final swishing sound. "Shit," he said, releasing Noin gently, striding to the door and pulling it open. "Dorothy!"
She watched him disappear outside and then she was alone again with only the memory of his words and the tears on her cheeks. She had not cried in...when was the last time she had cried?
It had been too long ago.
"There's nothing to say," Dorothy informed him over her shoulder, not even looking at him as she stormed up the hill. He scrambled to follow her, his haste making him clumsy. He was a soldier, Milliard thought wearily to himself, not a prince in disguise.
Well, maybe he was, but he didn't see why...
"Dorothy, stop. Look, can't we-"
"There's nothing to say!" To his relief, however, she came to a sudden halt, hands on her hips, long golden hair swaying below her waist. She hadn't bound it up today. Her back was still turned as he came up behind her. "I won't listen to a word you say, Milliard Peacecraft."
"Dorothy, look. I know-"
"No you don't!" He was caught by surprise as she whirled on him, angry gray eyes like a summer storm. "How dare you put words in my mouth?"
"Dorothy, I-" What the hell, he thought. Just say it and be done with it. "Dorothy, I'm sorry."
"Liar," she said, but the fight had gone out of her. In the slumped set of her shoulders, he saw defeat.
"What's bothering you? If it's Noin and me..." he trailed off. What could he possibly say to that?
"There's nothing you can do about that," she said, echoing his thoughts. "So just forget it. Forget you ever knew me. Forget that we were ever friends, because we're not anymore!"
There was nothing to say to that. "Fine," he said flatly. "You said it. We're not friends anymore."
She didn't answer.
"Go get some sleep," he said. "That's an order, Lady Catalonia. We'll be moving out at dusk."
He didn't wait for a response, didn't expect one before he turned and moved slowly down the hill. Wondering how it was that things had come to this. He had valued her friendship...valued her. She was vivacious, passionate, intelligent, and a true soldier. In fact, if Noin hadn't...
He didn't want to think about that.
He reached his tent and sprawled out on the sleeping bag, watching the sunlight and dust patterns on the tent ceiling. He couldn't sleep. It was the wrong time, his body clock said. There were things to do, soldiers to brief, strategies to plan.
Though if all went well tonight, it would be the last strategy they ever needed to plan here, in the field. If all went well, the A007 government would never know what hit them before all their mobile suit resources went up in a puff of smoke.
If they could take control of the base.
He thought of Gustavson, and his firm belief in the case.
He thought of Etille, the face of a soldier who had seen too many engagements and yet still pressed on because it was his duty.
He thought of Dorothy, her golden hair swimming around her face, her eyes trying to tell him something as he swayed under the hypnotic pulse of her lips opening and closing without sound.
He thought of Noin, her arms around him and her unique scent and her voice, her raw determination in the face of the enemy.
The last thing he saw before he drifted off to sleep was the face of another golden-haired girl...sweet and innocent, like an angel...or like a princess...
"Zechs," the voice said. "Zechs, wake up."
His arm hurt again and he had a crick in his neck from sleeping the wrong way. He groaned.
"Zechs." The hand shook him. "Come on. We're getting ready. We're packing up some of the camp...the mobile suits are getting warmed up."
He opened his eyes. It was dark, and Noin was carrying a lamp that in his blurred vision looked like shining water.
"It's time already?" Stretching. His injured arm screamed at him, but he ignored it. "Feels like I just fell asleep."
"In uniform too." She looked critically at him. "I suppose that's normal. Your troops are waiting for you."
The mobile suits had been moved closer, and he slid into the seat, already feeling the welcome touch of the instruments and the familiar light of the panels. The suit was already alive and humming, having been warmed up before his arrival. He rather wished that he had been the one to start it up, but he couldn't afford to be picky at times like this.
"Bravo squadron, all systems go." Gustavson, on the far side of the camp.
"Charlie squadron, all systems go." Etille.
Noin's face appeared on the screen. She was smiling. "Delta squadron, all systems go."
"Echo squadron," said Dorothy. Her picture did not appear on the screen. Milliard sighed. "All systems go."
He wondered if she was still upset at him.
"All right," he said. "Alpha squadron, all systems go. We're moving out. Stay close and tight. You know where you're going. Follow your squad leader."
The faces of the squadron leaders blinked off the comm screen, and he headed into the cliffs, power settings low to avoid radar detection. The blips of the mobile suits behind him were glaringly bright on his scope, and he wondered how many they would lose tonight. Two? Eight? Twenty?
Those soldiers would die here, far from home, names and faces lost in the dirt of some far-out, barren colony, not even remembered for what they had done. For some reason, the thought of that was strangely numbing, as if he knew exactly which ones would die tonight.
"Alpha leader, target spotted."
"Roger that, Charlie leader." He flicked his targeting scope on. If Charlie had spotted the target from their area, that meant the base was coming up close at hand.
"All communications, off," he ordered over the comm. Grasping the stick too tightly. His hand was sweating. "Follow my lead."
With a crackle, the comm went dead as he flipped the switch. The bright infrared flared to life over the viewport scope and he saw the base come to life in lines and blobs of muddy green light. The guns were silent. So far, so good.
"Here goes nothing," he said, as he pulled to the right and the mobile suit's thrusters came to life in a roar, and he opened fire.
"Echo leader, this is Delta leader. Target spotted."
"Roger that," Dorothy said, snapping a quick readjustment to her targeting scope and running one finger along the safety harness keeping her firmly anchored in her chair. It was tight around her breasts and she could feel it pulling uncomfortably with every jolt. "Echo squadron, communications off."
Switching her own comm off, she flicked the infrared. Immediately the world around her lit up. Clouds of smoky green light flashed in front of her, behind the towering cliffs blocking most of her vision. That must be Milliard and Gustavson. Etille should still be on his way, if all went well. Etille was the key to the strategy. Etille and Noin...
"We're going in," she said to no one in particular. The blips behind her shifted as she powered on her thrusters. The walls of the base loomed in her bright green vision and the first mobile suits glided towards her.
"I'll show you what I'm made of, Noin," she ground between her teeth. "You'll see!"
The explosions shook the air around the cliffside but Noin kept her grasp firmly on the stick in her hand, glancing at the scope now and then to make sure that Milliard was still there.
It was selfish, she knew, but she figured it as her duty. It didn't matter that she'd also glance now and again to look if a second dot was there, the dot labeled E1.
Why do you hate me so much?
Because you're you. And I don't like people like that.
She and Etille were the plan, after Milliard, Dorothy, and Gustavson had drawn the main base force out from its cover. Surprisingly enough, according to Etille, there might be large numbers of mobile suits in the base hangars, but there were actually very few personnel stationed there who could operate a suit with any sort of efficiency.
Bureaucrat personnel, he'd said, disdainfully. Rather sit at a desk and do paperwork than fly.
Milliard seemed to be holding his own. The side of the cliff was dark and chilly, and Noin found herself shivering in her chair. Turning the heater up a notch, she rubbed her arms.
They were all just children, really.
They were too young to die.
The blip that was Dorothy worked its way closer and closer to the heart of the base, to the main building. Towards Milliard.
Noin's hands clenched on the control stick.
"Now, Noin," Milliard muttered under his breath. She should be watching the scopes, knowing when most of the mobile suits had been knocked away. Clearing a path. The guard towers had been no match for an experienced pilot like himself, and their small force had outnumbered the base defenses, as Etille had said.
They'd forced their way around to the main building, as Etille had told them, he and Dorothy forming a defense line to allow Gustavson's suits to make it through, and it looked clear. Before another squadron of reinforcements had come through.
It didn't look so good anymore.
To his left something exploded, but he didn't turn his head to see what, just kept shooting. Kept firing. His arm began to throb again and he switched fire control to the other hand, keying the comm for emergency transmission.
"Alpha squadron, stats!"
"We've lost Three and Four, sir. And Five is at 60%."
He darted to the side, fired his thrusters, narrowly missing the laser beam that came from behind. The suit slammed into the ground and he jerked the stick hard, trying to minimize the shock. "Damn it, Noin," he whispered. "Where are you?"
"They're here!"
Gustavson's curt voice over the comm, and Dorothy looked to her left, around Milliard's suit, to the line of mobile suits sweeping towards their position. That was Etille. Where was Noin?
"Zechs! Look out!"
Milliard's craft sidestepped as the enemy suit came in low to the ground, thrusters firing at maximum output. As it hit the ground she saw the other suit come out of nowhere, opening fire. The enemy suit exploded.
"Zechs, watch your back!"
Noin.
"You watch yours!" Dorothy grated over the comm, and was rewarded by Milliard's grim face flickering onto her scope.
"That's enough, Dorothy."
"Shut up!" she screamed. "Don't tell me what to do!"
"Dorothy-" Noin.
"Leave me alone!" The explosions rocked her craft, and she jerked the stick wildly, letting her mobile suit spin into the sky, spraying fire. Screaming. "Leave me alone!"
"Mobile suit at ten o' clock."
"Got it," Noin said, spinning and clipping it twice, once on the leg and once in the chest. It fell in a shower of sparks.
"Are you all right?"
"I'm fine," she said, catching another one in the arm. The gun dropped from its hand, smoking. A laser blast grazed the arm of her suit and it shuddered, readings dropping. She readjusted the power output. "You take care of youself, Zechs. I don't want to lose you again."
"I know," he said over the comm. Switching frequencies. "Bravo Leader, code orange."
"Roger that," Gustavson said, and she saw his suits break off their engagements, following him to the other side of the base. The enemy suits hesitated for a minute, and she saw them turn.
"Follow them!" Milliard barked.
"Roger. Delta squadron, we're going in."
"Echo squadron," she heard Dorothy repeat. "We're going in. Watch your back!"
"We need more people over here! Can you spare two?"
"Charlie leader to Echo leader," came the faint reply. "Negative. We are all occupied over here."
Dorothy slammed her fist into the control panel. "Damn! They keep coming!"
"Six o' clock, Echo leader!"
She flicked a glance at the scope just in time to avoid the rapid fire coming from the Taurus behind her. That had been Noin on the comm. "I don't need your help," she said, opening fire.
"Suit yourself," Noin said, hurt evident in her voice. That was fine with Dorothy. She didn't need Noin's help. She didn't need Milliard's help, either. She was all right.
She'd show them that she could handle things on her own.
"Delta leader," Milliard said, "Do you need reinforcements?"
"That would be much appreciated, Alpha leader."
"Roger. On my way."
The other side of the base was even brighter. Two outbuildings were on fire. There was twisted metal wreckage on the ground, and the lasers were thick here. He could hardly see.
Squeezing the trigger with one hand, he reached over and flicked off the infrared. The moon was bright, accenting the fire's glow. At this rate, the fire would reach the mansion in no time.
"Bravo leader!" he said tersely over the comm. "The building's going to catch fire!"
"I see it," came the response. "On it."
The suit came in from behind, and he barely ducked before it roared by.
"Noin! Watch it!"
"Got it," she said, before the suit exploded in an impressive fireball.
"Zechs," she began.
She heard it coming before she saw it, the brilliant red suit highlighted by the fires leaping into the sky, saw the comm screen flicker fuzzily.
He was young, the pilot, with blond hair cropped close to his head, brilliant blue eyes. She caught her breath. He looked like-
"My name is Lieutenant Commander Davi Morgan." His voice was tight, angry. "Rebels, you'll pay for what you've done!"
"Wait!" she heard Milliard yell, but the face disappeared as quickly as it had come, and the red suit disappeared behind the building to her right. She backstepped, waiting.
"Dorothy! Look out! DOROTHY!"
She was turning too slowly. The mobile suit's eyes seemed to be watching her, laughing. Laughing because she was going to die.
"DOROTHY!" Noin screamed, and she slapped the control panel, all power to rear thrusters, leapt into the air, speeding towards the red mobile suit which in the flames of the buildings looked like it was made of fire itself.
"MOVE, DOROTHY! MOVE!"
Noin's mobile suit was moving too quickly, and the red suit was on the wrong trajectory, and there was going to be a collision.
He had to do something.
"No, Noin!" he yelled, trying to bring enough power to the engines for a last, desperate heroic act. Better he than her. Better-
He wouldn't make it. He needed Epyon, and this was no Epyon.
"NOIN!" he cried. "NO!"
The only thing Dorothy saw before the explosion blinded her was the red suit in her view and then the other suit, crossing her path of vision, throwing her to the ground. Her neck twisted and she saw spots. Felt a searing pain.
There was a flash of light.
The explosion lit up the complex, scraps of molten metal flying outwards, embedding themselves in his windshield. It cracked.
"No," Milliard said. "No." He punched the comm. "Delta leader. Come in, Delta leader. Come in. Delta leader!"
The smoke was clearing, but he could see nothing.
"Noin!" he called desperately, watching the scope for something. Anything. A bit of light, to know what she had made it.
"Noin?" Dorothy whispered. Staring up at the sky.
The stars were still there.
The lump of twisted, half-melted metal smoking in the small crater too far in front of him was black in the light of the flames. It couldn't be...she was alive. She had to be alive. She'd be there any minute now, walking out from the blast unhurt, waving at him, saying, it's all right Zechs. I'm here. I'm still here.
"NOIN!" he screamed, letting go of the stick and pounding the control panel with both fists, hearing glass crack and the hissing of broken electric wires, but he didn't care.
She couldn't be dead.
He wouldn't let her be dead.
"Alpha leader! Alpha leader!"
"FUCK YOU!" he screamed, jerking the stick with the intensity of a madman, feeling his blood boil, opening fire without aiming, just wanting to kill. "FUCK YOU!"
The building behind him exploded in a shower of flames, and he could see a mobile suit very close behind him. Friend or enemy? It didn't matter.
Nothing mattered anymore.
"Let me die," he said. Calmly now. "I'm going to die."
"Alpha leader! Pull out! Pull out now!"
"LET ME DIE!"
The light of the explosions blinded him, or maybe it was tears, but he hadn't cried in so long that he couldn't remember what it was like anymore, but there was something coming at him, coming out of the rolling billows of smoke, before he released the mobile suit's thrusters and charged headlong into the thick black cloud.
Go to Noin side Waking
END SAINAN NO KEKKA ACT VI
Go to Quicksilver's Relics Arc Mission Log
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Act VI Part III | Act VII Part I | Back to Sainan no Kekka