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Gundam Wing is property of Sotsu Agency, Bandai Studios, and TV Asahi. Sainan no Kekka and all original characters and plot copyright 2000-2002 by Quicksilver and Gerald Tarrant. Please ask permission before reposting.
SAINAN NO KEKKA
--Gundam Wing, Brave Eyes And where are all the gods?" -Bonnie Tyler, Holding Out for a Hero Most of the base was still sectioned off, and he seriously doubted that it would be fully functional any time soon. Even though it had been almost four days, he imagined he could still smell smoke in the air, feel the tension around him as the alarms went off and the guards had grabbed him, hustling him of to the shelters. He was no stranger to violent conflict, but he'd thought he had left it all behind him in the Breaks. To have experienced it twice in places that he'd thought were secure against such things - once at Cliffside and once on the Preventers Base - was shocking, to say the least. To have his perfectly ordered world upset like this had been a freak accident the first time. The second time...Shinobu would have bet anything that trouble was trying to follow him wherever he went. He knew that it wasn't true in the least; they were targeting Duo, not him, and he just happened to be wherever Duo went. But something inside him insisted that things would be safer if he just left. Safer for who? For Duo, or for him? He wasn't a selfish person. He refused to believe that despite his efforts, he'd turned out just like his father and his grandfather before him. His was a selfish family, and he'd run away from it to escape that, and he couldn't - wouldn't - accept that his rebellion had been in vain. Maybe that was selfish. He plodded morosely down the sidewalk, wandering aimlessly. He hadn't talked to his grandfather since leaving Cliffside, but he knew he was just putting off the inevitable. Seki Hikaru had a knack of knowing exactly where he was at any given time, and he didn't doubt that sooner or later, his grandfather would find a way to get a hold of him even on the headquarters of the World Nation's military. I wanted to get you into the family business, but not like this. You're playing with fire, boy, and if you're not careful, you're going to get burned. His lip twisted scornfully. It was all right for his grandfather to say those words; he wasn't the one in the middle of a world crisis. It seemed very far away now - the Breaks, the cartel, his family, the petty arguments and blood feuds that he'd so hated. He still hated them, but that was the small stuff, the things he could handle. Three weeks ago, even three days ago, if someone had asked him if he would be willing to give up his life and return to the cartel in order to help his friends, he wouldn't have been able to answer. But now, after the attack, he'd witnessed firsthand what might happen to the boy who had become one of the members of a surrogate family. He might want to run, but he knew he couldn't do that to Duo. He would not become the person his grandfather had become. It was a semi-cloudy day and just windy enough that Shinobu had to put one hand to his head to keep his baseball cap from blowing off. It had been Duo's cap once, but he'd given it to Shinobu in one of their lunchtime chats when he'd first come to Cliffside. The idea of someone who was able to speak his language was so intoxicating to the Japanese boy that he'd found himself gravitating towards Duo almost immediately after his language counselor had informed him that the new student, Duo Maxwell, was fluent in Japanese and would be helping him with his studies. Duo's carefree personality was a little jarring at first; he'd never known that someone could be so happy, so...alive. But as he'd come to know the braided American better, he'd found that not all sides of Duo's personality was sunny. There were times when they would be sitting in the library doing homework, when he would realize that Duo was staring at him with a focused, almost haunted expression on his face. Duo? he would say in Japanese. What's wrong? And Duo would always respond in a far-off voice, You remind me of someone. Who? he would ask. And then Duo would turn back to his books as if the conversation had never taken place. It might have frustrated someone else, but Shinobu was a product of the Breaks, and he had learned never to ask questions when it was not necessary. And even if it had been a pressing matter between them, he doubted he could have pried Duo's past out of him. Well, there was no need for that now. The past was here staring all of them in the face, and he didn't know if any of them had the power to stop it. And Ilene was dead. He and Helena had been waiting for Duo in his makeshift quarters that night after the attack. He'd finally found the blond girl in a small group of civilians being herded by security guards to the nearest shelter. He'd joined the group, wanting to explain to her what had happened back in the computer room, or at least tell her that he was sorry. To his surprise, she had smiled at him, a bit nervously, but it was a genuine smile. "It's all right," she said. "I understand." She didn't say exactly what she understood, but her smile was enough, and they'd sat through the attack together in the underground shelter, she pressed up against him, he with his arm wrapped tightly around her shoulders, feeling the tremors of explosions and gunfire through the ground. Neither of them had been afraid. What was done was done, and it was out of their hands now. They were no longer high school students - they were adults. Duo had finally burst into his quarters at half past ten o clock that night, and they'd both jumped to their feet in shock. This wasn't the Duo they remembered - this Duo was dirty, with torn clothes and bloodstains on his shirt and jeans. But the worst part was his eyes. He looked like he had been crying, but there were no tears now, just a deadness that frightened Shinobu. "Duo?" Helena whispered. "Leave," Duo said in a flat voice. "Duo," Shinobu said more firmly, placing one hand on Helena's shoulder and squeezing it slightly. "What happened?" The blank eyes stared at them, moving to one face, then another, then Duo shrugged. "Ilene's dead." Helena made a choked sound between a gasp and a sob, and Shinobu felt something plummet to the pit of his stomach. "You're joking." In two steps, Duo was across the room, grabbing a fistful of Shinobu's t-shirt and dragging him close. "Would I be joking about this? Would I be fucking joking about something like this?!" "Stop it!" Helena begged. "Stop it! Duo!" Her last word was practically a scream, and Shinobu wrenched himself away from the braided boy's iron grip, breathing hard. "I couldn't save her," said Duo. His fury seemed to have disappeared, and the dead eyes were back, set in a face that looked curiously dead as well. It was unnerving on someone who had just hours before been so full of life. "I couldn't...two steps, Shin." His head whipped around and the pain in that face was nearly unbearable. "Two fucking steps...I was so close..." Helena was shaking her head. "No...no...how could Ilene be here? How could...I don't understand." Tears rolled down her cheeks. Then it hit Shinobu. "She was one of the terrorists," he said wonderingly, not even shocked, simply unbelieving. Duo laughed bitterly. "Bingo. Our sweet, little Ilene, a terrorist." He laughed, and Shinobu winced at the harsh sound. "Don't joke like that!" Helena breathed, looking horrified. "It's true," Duo said. "I may run, and I may hide, but I never lie." He spread his arms as if in supplication, then spun on one foot. "The room is yours. I'm leaving." "Where are you going, Duo?" Shinobu said, alarmed. Bitter laughter drifted back to him. "Where I belong." "Duo-!" Helena choked out, lunging after him, but Shinobu caught her arm. "Let him be. He just needs to be alone right now." It was two days later now, and Shinobu had not seen the pilot anywhere. He was sure that Duo hadn't come to harm, because if something had happened to him, General Po would certainly have notified him. He hadn't seen Hilde around either, and assumed that the two were off somewhere having their private time. That left him and Helena. The day after that, she'd learned that Chris was on base, in the hospital, wounded but alive. Since then, she had been scarce also. He wasn't sure what her relationship was with the other boy, but she at least seemed willing to give it another try. Shinobu knew he shouldn't be, but he was jealous. Sometimes he'd catch himself wondering what would have happened if Chris had died, and each time he would spend hours berating himself. Chris was a friend, the same as Duo. The same as Helena was. She was a friend, too, nothing more. He sighed, looked up at the sky, and began to retrace his steps to the temporary dormitory. It was just a little after noon and he had not had lunch, but he was not hungry. The hallways of the building were mostly empty except for a few small children running around unsupervised, and he headed towards his room with the dim prospect of spending another day sitting there, doing nothing, and hoping that his grandfather would not find him before he could do something to help. He turned the corner and saw that the door to his room was open. He frowned. He hadn't left the door open and no one else had the key. Maybe Helena...? But it wasn't Helena. Stepping into the sparsely furnished room, Shinobu saw someone kneeling, rummaging through a chest. He was about to demand to know what the stranger was doing in his room when he looked at the number on the door again, and at the same time that he realized that he was in the wrong building, the stranger looked up. "I'm sorry," Shinobu began, then his brain registered who he was talking to. The dark-skinned boy's face was tight with some unknown emotion, but his features were very familiar. "You again," the boy said. "What do you want?" He blinked. "Darkflight, isn't it?" "Unless someone important sent you," Darkflight returned, his voice surly, "you'd best leave before I get angry." "What did I ever do to you?" Shinobu demanded. He wasn't used to being blamed for things he didn't do, and he didn't see what this boy had against him. Darkflight sneered. "Nothing." Shinobu ground his teeth in frustration and decided that the conversation was over, turning to leave - then paused. It was the perfect time...the only time, probably, where he would get to ask the question that had been bothering him in one form or another since he had arrived on base. "You," he said. "What?" The boy sounded defensive, and Shinobu turned back around, the anger fading from his mind now, a cautious foreboding taking its place. It must have showed on his expression, because immediately, Darkflight dropped into a crouch, his eyes wary. Shinobu knew that crouch. It was the classic posture of the assassin about to make a kill. "Where are you from, exactly?" he said. "In the Breaks." A spasm crossed Darkflight's face, almost too quick for him to see if he hadn't been looking for it. "I don't know what you're talking about." "You told me yourself you were from the Breaks," Shinobu returned. "It's useless to lie. I know exactly who you are." He was not prepared for the look of pure venomous hate that crossed the dark face, not prepared for the knife that suddenly appeared in the other's hand. "And who exactly am I?" he growled. Shinobu's hands were sweaty. "You're the descendent of Shionji Kouhito of the Shionji Cartel," he said. "The son of the missing boy subject from the Operation Ares experiment. Aren't you?" Darkflight stared at him. "Aren't you?" Shinobu repeated harshly. And then the other boy did the last thing Shinobu expected. He burst out laughing. "This isn't funny!" he snapped. "Answer me, dammit!" Darkflight's laughter faded. "You are a fucking moron," the dark-skinned boy replied calmly, but he didn't come out of his crouch. Instead, he took one fluid step forward, eyes fixed on Shinobu. Shinobu swallowed. "What are you doing?" "Getting rid of you," Darkflight said. He smiled, showing his teeth. "You haven't answered me!" Shinobu said desperately, backing up till he was up against the half-open door of the room. He took another step and the door slammed shut. The sound echoed in the hallway outside. "I'm right, aren't I? Aren't I?" "I know nothing about any Shionji cartel members," Darkflight hissed. "All I know is that you know way too much, and Shadowwing never leaves anyone like you alive." "Shadowwing?" Shinobu breathed in disbelief. "No way..." The pieces of the puzzle snapped into place. Darkflight was the other half of Shadowwing, who had been sent to China to kill Chang Wufei, and the reason he was here was because- "Your partner," he said, "is Heero Yuy." "My partner's name," Darkflight ground out, "is Wing! Not Heero Yuy! Heero Yuy is dead!" "I was only trying to-" Shinobu said, but Darkflight had already begun to move, and he threw himself to the side, hoping to avoid the blade, but he was no match for a trained assassin. Darkflight was on him before he could take one step, and he felt himself being pushed to the ground, felt the tip of the knife at his throat. "I don't like you," Darkflight said. "I don't like you either," Shinobu bit out, forcing himself to keep his gaze level with the dark eyes. His heart was thudding. Don't let him see you waver. Don't let him see that you're afraid. "You're afraid of me, aren't you?" Darkflight mocked. "You're afraid to die?" "If you kill me," Shinobu said, trying to keep his voice calm, "you will get a very large price on your head that I don't think you'll be able to outrun." "Oh yeah?" The knife point didn't waver. "And why is that?" "Because I'm the heir of the Black Diamond cartel," Shinobu said, forcing the corners of his lips up in a sardonic grin. "And heirs are expensive to kill." "You think that's going to stop me?" But the voice was a little less forceful now, and he could see something that hadn't been in Darkflight's face before. Not fear, certainly...he was a trained assassin, and the word around was that trained assassins could not be threatened. But if not fear, then perhaps...caution. "Admit it," Shinobu challenged. "You're not just any assassin, Darkflight. You're the best of the best...and the best of the best isn't just born off the streets of L1. It's made. You - your family, your father - were MADE! Weren't you?" "Shut up," Darkflight whispered. Shinobu could see sweat forming at his hairline, glistening beads in the fluorescent lighting of the room. "The Operation Ares prototypes were the best there were at that time. Your father...he was the last experiment, wasn't he? He was one of the successful ones." "I don't know what you're talking about!" He didn't miss the edge of panic in Darkflight's voice, and suddenly he knew he had the advantage back. He moved, suddenly, intending to knock the other boy off balance, perhaps knock the knife out of his hand, but Darkflight was quicker. As Shinobu moved to push himself forward off the floor, Darkflight shifted his weight to the balls of his feet. The knife flashed. He felt a stinging sensation in his right shoulder, heard a cracking sound as he tumbled to the floor again with all his weight falling on his right elbow. Darkflight's breath came in short gasps. "Don't you...ever...threaten me...again!" The dark eyes blazed at him. "I didn't threaten you," Shinobu snarled. "I want the truth from you! Admit it, that you're the heir of the Shionji cartel!" "I don't remember!" "You're lying!" "I DON'T REMEMBER!" Darkflight screamed, slumping against the wall and clutching at his head as though it pained him. Shinobu tried to struggle to a sitting position, watching him, tried to staunch the flow of blood from his collarbone with his shirt. There were streaks of dark, wet blood across the white tiled floor. "You-" he began, and Darkflight shook his head. "Leave me alone. Just...leave me alone!" Shinobu stared at him, unsure what to make of this. He was almost positive Darkflight was the son of one of the original experiments involving the Shionji children, but if the other boy was denying it...the denial itself wasn't what worried him. Denials were just words, after all. But the way Darkflight was holding his head, the way his eyes were darting back and forth...something just didn't feel right. "I...remember...lights. Lots of lights," Darkflight whispered, and Shinobu opened his mouth to ask him what the hell he was talking about, closed it again. The dark eyes were closed, and Darkflight was rocking back and forth, hugging himself. "...they took him away...they took...him away. I never saw him again. I..." He trailed off, making a sobbing noise in his throat. Shinobu gaped at him. "Then it was dark...pain..." his head came up and he stared at Shinobu with empty eyes. "There's nothing after that." There was something missing. Something he wasn't getting here...if Darkflight remembered the operations, remembered being taken away from his family...no, that was impossible. He'd have to be over forty years old by now, if he were the original subject, and this boy didn't look over seventeen. Somewhere in a corner of his mind, a small warning bell began ringing, but Shinobu ignored it. "You do remember." "Bits and pieces," Darkflight said shakily. "I've always had bits and pieces. I don't remember, Shinobu. Whatever your name is. I don't fucking remember!" The hand that held the knife was trembling. "I'm sorry I don't match up to who you wanted me to be...sorry you can't take your revenge on me." Mocking, taunting. "That's what you want, right? Revenge. For your stupid little cartel. Like it matters anyway." Shinobu's hands curled into fists at his side. His right shoulder and arm were on fire, but he ignored them. "You're an arrogant bastard." "So are you." Darkflight growled and leaped again, and Shinobu cried out as his broken arm was jarred, brought up his other arm up to defend himself from the blow. "STOP IT!" Darkflight froze, half crouching, and Shinobu moved his head, painfully, until he could see the door....and gasped. "Helena?" He hadn't heard the door open, but she was standing there, her hands over her mouth, eyes wide, staring at them as if they were ghosts. "What on earth are you DOING?" "It is a long story-" he began in English, but Darkflight cut him, speaking in Japanese. "Who is this?" he demanded. "A friend. You know what those are, right?" "Fucking son of a-" Darkflight growled, raising the knife, and Helena gave a short scream. "Don't you DARE!" "Helena!" he shouted, but she was already running towards them, reaching him and throwing her arms around him. "Don't touch him!" "Don't you hurt her!" Shinobu cried, but instead of moving towards her with the weapon as he had thought Darkflight would, the assassin simply gave a careless, forced laughed, standing and gesturing with the knife. "Get out. Conversation is over." Helena looked confused and angry, and Shinobu struggled up. She helped him stand, casting frightened, defensive glances at Darkflight all the while, but the dark-skinned boy took no notice of her. It was if their conversation had never taken place. "We're not finished yet," Shinobu said, pausing in the doorway, and Darkflight didn't move to face him. "Yes we are," he said. It was only until they'd made it to the front lobby, where she'd sat him in a chair and marched up to the receptionist's desk and made a request for medical aid, did Helena turn to him with a puzzled and worried look on her face. "Just what were you doing in there, Shin?" He gave her a weak smile. "Nothing. Nothing that you would want to know."
Hilde's questioning voice echoed through the hangar, the two silent giants inside seeming to be standing in a mournful vigil over the wounded base. She scowled up at Deathscythe Hell, careful to keep her eyes off the other Gundam. She thought she was over the whole "seeing everything with a golden light" thing she'd picked up from flying Wing Zero, but she sure as hell didn't want to take any chances. And they couldn't get her back into the cockpit if they told her it was the only way to ensure world peace.
Some things just weren't worth it.
There was no answer, and she sighed as she hadn't really been expecting one, having a good idea where she might find her boyfriend. The looming Deathscythe seemed to mock her as she glared at it. "I bet you think this is funny, don't you?" she asked. The she clenched her fists and rolled her eyes. "Great. I'm talking to an inanimate object- I'm just as crazy as the pilots themselves!" she declared. She stomped her foot angrily, wishing Duo would just act normal for a change. Then again, if he did normal, then he wouldn't be Duo.
Hilde tilted her head back, examining the newly repaired Gundam carefully. Everything had been refinished, the dents had been carefully smoothed, and she knew all of the systems had been rechecked, and pronounced to be at 100% operating efficiency. The scent of fresh paint tickled her nose, and she approached one of the wires that had been left out. Stepping onto the hoist, Hilde clutched the line tightly in both hands and let it pull her up until she was even with the cockpit. "Duo?"
No answer still.
"I feel ridiculous," she muttered to herself. She heaved a mental sigh and rapped her knuckles smartly on the hatch. "Anyone home?"
It smoothly slid open along the grooves with slight swoosh of sound and rush of canned air, freshly oiled and almost like new. Duo peeked out at her, rubbing his blearing eyes. "Whaddya want, Hil? Can't a guy get some sleep?"
Agilely she swung down so she was sitting at his feet. It was a tight fit, but at least this was she wasn't dangling off the hangar floor by a wire. She wasn't acrophobic, but she didn't like heights that much. "You could get some sleep if you were willing to sleep somewhere logical. We've got a room, you know," she said. "And you could use a shower and a shave." She patted his cheek, which was starting to get a little stubble on it. "You're not fifteen anymore- you need to shave every now and then!"
He rubbed his jaw line. His beard wasn't thick enough to require daily shaving, so that meant it'd been at least two days since... "How long have I been in here?" he asked.
"Aside from your brief stint playing messenger boy after finding out Trowa had that concussion, more then four days! It's time to come out!"
He flicked his braid back over his shoulder, feeling decidedly unwell. :"I just... don't want to leave the Gundams. Just in case..."
"In case what?" she asked. "We're attacked again? The attackers weren't able to get anywhere near here! And locking yourself in here isn't going to help."
"But-"
"C'mon. I'm not going to fetch you food anymore, and it's time you cleaned up. I'll even braid your hair for you," she promised teasingly.
He blushed. Braiding his hair had often led to other, more sensual pursuits in the past. He rose and pulled her to her feet, wrapping an arm around her waist. "Hold onto me, k? This hoist isn't meant for two...."
"Shouldn't I just wait?" Hilde asked nervously.
"Nah! It's strong enough to lift a few metric tons, you and me ain't gonna be a problem," he said. "Just don't let go before we reached the bottom!"
She trusted him enough to allow him to pull her close, one hand around her, with the other on the cable, steadying their descent. She squeezed her eyes shut tightly and started to count backwards from twenty.
"You can open your eyes now," he told her.
Now that she had him out of the small cockpit, she decided that it would be a good time to broach her other reason for coming. "Trowa's coming out of the hospital today," she said. "Catherine wanted me to let you know."
"So?"
Her eyes widened in concern. "He's been there for a few days. He shouldn't have been moving around with that concussion, but he did it cause he wanted to warn the base. It's not his fault he was too late to do any good. Well, much good."
"Kill Ilene, you mean."
If the doctors hadn't pronounced that Trowa's wounds were over a day old, she would have strongly suspected Duo of doing the damage in a fit of rage. She nibbled on the inside of her lip, the tender flesh sore as she considered how to word what she wanted to say. "Duo, you're going to have to talk to him," she said.
"He killed her, Hilde," Duo said quietly, wrapping his arms around his knees as he slipped to the floor. "No matter which way you look at it, he killed her."
"He did it to save your life, Duo," she said. She had known that this was going to be sensitive territory. She herself hadn't known the girl, but from what Helena had told her, she'd guessed that most people had viewed Ilene as a possible girlfriend for Duo. She'd shared more time with him than Hilde had, all told, but it was hard to be jealous now. Hilde was alive, and Ilene was not.... how could you hate a dead girl?
"My life didn't need saving!"
"From what I understand, Ilene had gone over the deep end. I may not be the best person to talk to about this, since I didn't know her, but Helena and Shinobu don't fault you. You shouldn't blame yourself."
"Who should I blame then? Trowa?"
Hilde shook her head. "Sometimes there is no one to blame. Sometimes life just happens, and we learn to accept the hand God has dealt us."
He looked up at her, a frown furrowing the smooth skin of his brow. "There is no such thing as God," he said fiercely. "There never was! Why the hell do I bother wearing this thing?" he snapped angrily, clutching his cross. With a jerk, he snapped the chain, and chucked it across the room with all his might. "It's a reminder of all that wrong with this fucked-up world," he swore furiously.
She watched the glittering object sail across the room. "Duo... didn't Father Maxwell and Sister Helen give you that?" She knew it had been important to him, his only link to his past.
"A sign of their folly. Their God is dead, i‚† he ever existed in the first place," he said. "He never was worth their faith."
Hilde knelt down beside him, brushing back stray wisps of hair from his face. "I believe in God," she whispered to him. "Every time I look into your eyes, I see him there. There has to be a God- only God could grant me someone like you." She brushed a kiss across his cheek and started to pull back, only to be caught tightly against his body. They wrapped their arms around each other, taking strength from each other's presence.
"Hilde," he whispered. "Will you let me stay?"
She shut her eyes empathetically, understanding. Once before she had sent him off on his own, knowing that he needed time to discover himself. Her abrupt actions had hurt him, but she had done the right thing- he had needed that time to find himself. He had needed to learn what normal life was. Now, though... "I love you, Duo. Even if we're not together, I want you to know that."
He gripped her more tightly. "I missed you so much."
She melted at his touch. She wanted to stay next to him forever, but knew the world wouldn't be cooperative. Still, she could dream...
"Am I interrupting?"
A nasal voice surprised them both. They were on their feet; Duo protectively crouched before Hilde as she fumbled to get a gun trained on the shadows. "Who's there?" Duo demanded.
Out of the shadows emerged another one of the pilots, one who had been as elusive as the rainbow, and just as untouchable.
"Heero!" Duo exclaimed, throwing himself forward and landing right in front of his friend with oomph of shock. Damn boots had no cushioning... Normally he would have grabbed Heero for a back-thumping hug and plunged headfirst back into their old friendship, but things had changed.
Duo stared at the Wing pilot for a moment, nothing the long hair and silently tracing the scar without actually touching him. He suddenly realized that he was taller than Heero now. The Japanese boy had grown too, but it was mostly muscle, not height. But he looked older, much older.
"Been a while, man."
"I need my knife," Heero answered, cutting through the usual niceties that were expected after a long separation.
Duo motioned to Hilde. "Can you leave us alone, babe? This is a guy thing."
She opened her mouth to protest, but something in Duo's lavender eyes halted the words before they could form on her lips. "I'll be back at our assigned room... and you'd better come after you're done talking to Yuy. No more sleeping in Deathscythe!" she declared. She kissed Duo briefly on the cheek, tossed a glare at Heero, and stomped out of the hangar, leaving the two former comrades alone.
"Hello, Heero. I'd say how are you, but you'd just grunt." He backed up a step, not removing his eyes from his one-time friend. "So let's cut the small talk, and you can start by telling me where the hell you've been, what you're up to, and why I shouldn't kill you for being an unmitigated jerk."
Heero seemed to be unmoved. "My knife.... You said you'd keep it for me."
"I have it, but you're not getting it back until you talk to me! I need some answers, man! I've been wandering around in the dark long enough, and I've had it! I want the truth, and you're gonna be the first person to give it to me!"
Heero's expression shifted slightly. "When are you going to learn that there is no truth? Only various lies."
It seemed to strike a sensitive spot. "You gotta believe in humans sometime, Heero," he said. "What happened to you?" He mimicked the scar on Heero's face in front of his own again, making it clear what he was asking about.
"Call it a baptism of blood, if you want. It was a gift."
"If you call that a gift, you need new friends. Looks like they barely kept from blinding your right eye permanently," Duo said, leaning in a little to inspect the old wound.
"He knew what he was doing."
Duo just rolled his eyes. "Talking to you is still like pulling teeth out of a crocodile, you know. Snap, snap! No telling when you're going to bite."
"My knife."
"Nope," Duo said, waving a finger back and forth under Heero's nose impudently. "Not until you answer my questions- try to use these things known as sentences? And maybe a paragraph or two, if you're feeling extravagent?"
"I was on L1. I worked as an assassin. I have no excuse for why you shouldn't kill me right now, but you're more practical than I am. Killing me benefits no one. My knife, now," Heero said.
"It's in Deathscythe," Duo said, stepping onto the hoist to get it. Heero had answered his questions, as much as Heero ever would- there was no reason
Heero waited patiently until he came back with the knife, which was still in the leather sheath. Pulling it out, he was surprised to see that it had been well maintained, as though Duo had taken it out periodically and cleaned it. The snap on the sheath was snug, and the knife slid out of it like water. "Thanks," he said.
"I promised I'd take care of it," he said. "I never lie." His eyes shifted over to the other item Heero had placed in his charge. "I admit to being a little surprise at the other present ya left me, though."
"I couldn't take care of him," Heero answered softly, wandering over to where Wing Zero was, its bird-like wings tucked carefully behind its back. "I couldn't even take care of myself."
"Saaaaa...." Duo said, and then seemed to reconsider whatever he'd been about to say. "None of us coped real well," he said. "I ran away from it, Trowa got stuck in some kind of limbo focused on his sister, Quatre did exactly what his family expected him to.... no one ever taught us how to be normal, Heero. It's natural we made mistakes."
Heero's cobalt blue eyes flickered for a second. "But you didn't hurt the people you loved the way I did...."
"Fuck that, Yuy!" Duo exploded. "One of my friends died in the attack -Trowa killed her! And all cause I didn't tell her the truth- didn't let her understand what really was going on. I wanted to protect her, keep her innocent, so I never let her know! If I had, she'd still be alive, and maybe the base wouldn't have been attacked! So don't you get on your damned high horse and stop saying me, me, me.... The world doesn't revolve around you, you self-centered egotist! There's other people in this world!"
Heero growled low in his throat. "I watched her die! Atsuki stopped because I called her name!"
Duo had no clue what Heero was rambling on about, but he wasn't about to watch his friend throw a pity party for himself. "So? Ilene died in front of me! Trowa shot her because he thought I needed saving, blast him! One of the people I'm closet to in the world killed one of my best friends! How the fuck do you think I feel right now? So, no, I'm not about to let you wallow in a pool of misery! We all have problems- it's called life! And you have to learn how to deal with it! Shutting yourself off and drinking alone ain't the answer! Why the hell did they let you out of rehab, anyway?" Duo tossed an accusing look at the long sleeves his friend wore. "Shouldn't you still be there?"
"They let me out."
"They don't have the brains God gave little green apples!"
Heero snorted. "There's no God- aren't you always the one telling me that?"
"You're an annoying jackass."
"You're still a child who hasn't grown up." Heero's counteract was below the belt.
"Really? I'm not the one whose holding the knife, ready to slit my throat cause my friend died." He tilted his head. "Or is that just an excuse? Using your friend's death as a way to avoid reality?"
This time Heero's snarl was much more primal, and Duo barely had time to brace himself for the punch the Wing pilot launched at him.
Duo, though, was a child of the streets, and knew all sorts of dirty nasty tricks that most people would call...extremely unfair. He tried to knee Heero in the stomach, hoping to put some distance between them; Heero had his knife out, and though Duo didn't think Heero would use it, he didn't want to take any stupid chances. He had trusted Ilene, and she'd wound up dead.
Heero managed to block Duo's attack, launching one of his own. His fingers lashed out for Duo's throat, and it was only a quick dodge by Duo that kept his windpipe from being crushed.
"Man, you mean it!" Duo said. "No more Mr. Nice Guy!"
The first thing Duo needed to do was obvious- get the knife away. He knew Heero was ambidextrous, so merely wounding his right hand wouldn't help. His eyes glanced around, wondering if there was shelter, but he couldn't find any. He was fast, but compared to a pissed-off Yuy, not fast enough. He couldn't run.... there was no place to hide, so....
Duo launched himself forward, landing heavily on top of Heero, and throwing them both to the floor roughly. The knife was sent flying off into the shadows, and they listened for a second as it rebounded off the cement floor with an unpleasant scraping sound.
They hit hard, yet somehow Heero ducked to avoid getting a concussion or worse. Duo's teeth were jarred, but he grabbed Heero's head and smashed it against the floor. "If you're gonna fight, fight like a man, dammit!"
Heero, apparently unaffected by what to most people would have been a serious injury, slugged him in the gut, then in the face with what seemed like the same motion, and Duo saw stars. He flipped him over and raised his fists, ready to maker Duo's face into pulp.
Duo blinked, trying to figure a way to get out of his unfortunate predicament. Heero was sitting on his chest, and there was no way he'd be able to get him off... so he did the only thing he could think of....
His long fingers reached up and started to tickle Heero under the armpits. Heero's eyes widened in amazement, and he started to chuckle. "Duo.... I'm not ticklish."
"It was worth a shot...." Duo grumbled, hoping Heero was calming down.
Heero surprised him with a grin, and then by helping him to his feet. "Wait a sec," he said, vanishing into the shadows after the knife.
"Not again...." Duo muttered, than walked over to Deathscythe, patting its leg affectionately. "All my friends go nuts and homicidal on me," he muttered.
Heero reappeared a minute later, tossing something at Duo. Before Duo could register it, his reflexes kicked in, and he caught the small item.
It was his cross, with its chain still broken.
"Just because the past hurts, doesn't mean we should forget it. It makes us who we are." He caressed the flat of the knife he had retrieved as well. "By the same token, we shouldn't cling to it foolishly." He took a deep breath, clutched his ponytail tightly for a second, then sawed through it with three quick jerks.
Duo blinked, and grabbed his braid. "I'm leaving mine alone!" he declared.
Heero's expression could almost be described as mischievous. The raggedly cut hair hung around his face messily, and Duo could see his friend in this stranger. "No one asked you to cut it- but for me, it was time to let go of all the foolishness I've been indulging in." His voice grew softer, but more determined then before. "I'm a Gundam pilot, and I'm needed right now. I promised to help Wufei win the war, once and for all, and I keep my word." Heero stared at the sawed-off ponytail in his hand, wondering if he could have it burned with Atsuki's remains. She should take the last of her Wing with her, he thought to himself.
Duo smiled at him, the first genuine smile he'd worn since Ilene had died. "Oi, Heero?"
The Wing pilot turned his head. "Yes?"
"Tell me about Atsuki," Duo said, rather than asked.
The air was still between them for about three heartbeats both of them could hear. "Sure. But only if you tell me about Ilene," Heero bargained.
Duo's eyes lit, and Heero could almost hear an audible click as they slid right back into their friendship. "There's nothing I'd rather do." Another pause, then Duo threw his arms around the shorter pilot in a back-thumping hug, the one he wanted to give Heero originally, almost knocking him off his feet with enthusiasm.
"Welcome back, Heero." |